


Nobody's Parents Are as Fun As Mine

by zarabithia



Category: Hawkeye (Comics)
Genre: Domestic Fluff, F/M, Kid Fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-31
Updated: 2015-12-31
Packaged: 2018-05-10 14:45:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,000
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5590243
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zarabithia/pseuds/zarabithia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Putting everybody into her family portrait was a problem for Eleanor Bishop-Barton. Uncle Bucky's supposed to be dead, after all.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Nobody's Parents Are as Fun As Mine

Their family is weird. Kate is used to this. Their kid is as weird as both of them combined, and therefore better than both of them, and Kate is used to this. Best thing either of them have ever done, blah blah blah. 

But Kate is a little stumped when Ellie brings home her “family portrait” after her first week in kindergarten. 

Clint’s not concerned, but when Clint was Ellie’s age, he was less than half a decade away from running away to join the circus, so what does he know? 

America is also not concerned. “In some cultures, it would be perfectly normal,” she says. “You’re not supposed to be the ignorant Hawkeye, princess." 

"Hey!" 

"Hush, Barton." 

But Kate ignores them, because the two of them fighting is one of the great constants in her life that she can always return after the crisis has been dealt with. 

Okay, so maybe it’s not a crisis. But it’s … different. 

"I had to include everyone,” Ellie says while her father and aunt bicker in the other room. Ellie is in the stage where she is very convinced that she can do everything herself. Teachers and the Internet call this stage “early childhood” but Kate laughs and calls it living up to her DNA, so she waits patiently while her daughter focuses on untying the triple knots that Clint put in her shoes this morning. 

(“Velcro is cheating, Mommy!" 

"It’s not!" 

”It is so, Bekka says so.“ 

"Bekka came from an egg, what does she know?" 

"That’s not nice, Daddy!”) 

“I had to include everybody,” Ellie explains. “I couldn’t leave anybody out! That’d be mean." 

"It would,” Kate agrees. “And I can see Aunt Cassie in her lab with her ants, and … you do know that Uncle Teddy didn’t really make a nest, don’t you? That was a joke, and not a very nice one." 

"Yeah, but it was funny,” Ellie explains. “So I kept it." 

Kate bites the inside of her jaw and glares at the kitchen because she can hear unrestrained laughter coming from there. From both of them. 

"I tried not to brag too much about the superhero stuff, though. Cause it’s not everybody else’s fault that their parents aren’t as fun as mine,” Ellie tells her. “That’s why everybody else is just standing around you and me and Daddy and Uncle Barney and Lucky." 

Kate nods, because there’s really nothing else to say about her daughter’s definition of "trying not to brag,” which apparently involves blocky figures with their symbols prominently displayed on their chest. Which means the only noticeable difference between America, Eli, and Steve Rogers is the length and color of their hair (and the fact that Steve Rogers has a pretty blue bow in his hair, which Kate thinks is a nice touch). 

“But I had to be extra sneaky when I was putting in Uncle Bucky,” Ellie says. “You know, I couldn’t just say that I have an awesome uncle who was frozen like Anna but came back to life because Uncle Steve cried even sadder than Elsa." 

”No,“ Kate says less firmly than she wants to. Mostly because she is now stuck with the image of Bucky singing "Do you want to build a snowman?” and she wonders if the good part of her is supposed to be appalled at herself. 

Things to ask Rebecca Kaplan for 1000, Alex.

“And I couldn’t say that my Uncle Bucky fought in a war for the Jedi and then got possessed by Russian Sith Lords - " 

"What? Ellie. Bucky has never been a Jedi. There are no Russian Sith Lords. How do you even know what a Jedi is. Your father and I have better taste than that.”

“Uncle David and Uncle Tommy said Uncle Bucky went to the dark side, but it wasn’t his fault, because the Russian Sith Lords possessed him with their evil mind tricks,” Ellie explains. She frowns and looks at Kate expectantly, pausing in the struggle with her shoe laces. “Uncle David and Uncle Tommy wouldn’t lie to me, Mommy!" 

"Uncle Tommy is going into time out,” Kate mutters under her breath. 

“Why?" 

"Because he is bad,” Kate informs her. “I’m still a little confused, Eleanor." 

Ellie sighs in exaggerated Barton fashion that will not be as adorable when she is 16 as it is now. "I couldn’t say that Uncle Bucky wrestled bears in the Sith Lord prison, or that he got stabbed in the heart by Azula-" 

”What?“ 

"And that he had to pretend to keep being dead, but really secretly he hangs out in space fighting space monsters, when he isn’t visiting Uncle Steve or having sleep overs with you and Daddy." 

Ellie gives up on her shoes and sighs, depositing both feet into her mother’s lap. 

Kate is caught, somewhere between wanting to explain that Sin is a Nazi and it is not appropriate to call her Azula, and trying not to laugh at the picture in front of her. 

Ellie is, after all very proud of it. 

"So that’s why … you have a little blue and black skulls all over your family portrait,” Kate muses as she unties Barton’s mess of a knot. “For your Uncle Bucky." 

And by skulls, Kate means that there are blue and black skulls beside Kate, beside Clint, one beside Ellie, two beside Steve, one up in the sky next to the sun, one up in the sky with a hat on, and one … that looks like it is bleeding profusely on the ground. 

"Yup. Because he’s supposed to be dead,” Ellie agrees cheerfully. “And ‘cause Uncle Bucky has lots of adventures." 

"Not as many as we do!” Clint protests from the kitchen as Kate pulls off her daughter’s shoes. 

“Can we have adventures in macaroni and cheese, Daddy?” Ellie asks as she runs towards her father. 

Kate watches her go, looks down at the teacher’s concerned note, and crumbles it into a little ball.

The family portrait goes on the fridge.


End file.
